After much time off from writing, I've been searching to something (really anything) to inspire me back to writing... and I've found it! My love for reality TV. I heart the Bachelor/Bachelorette series on ABC. Just to let all of you know, the opinions expressed in this blog are my and mine alone. ABC didn't put me up to this and relax people, I'm joking on a lot of the stuff I'm about to say (so please don't get pissy if/when I offend you/your ideals/believes or political affiliation cuz I'm sure it will happen)! Just remember I'm writing all of this in the name of reality television love!
Are you ready for some pre-season warm ups?
Yes, I feel that the bachelorette is like a sport, everybody is competing for something; it should be love but I'm sure more are in it for fame, free booze, embarrassment, infamy... There's a whole lotta fighting and crying all the way through season and in the end there is typically a shiny prize! It's pretty much the NFL and the Final Rose is the Super Bowl.
Ok, now that's out of the way, I'm going to introduce you to the Bachelorette.
Name: Ashely Herbert
Hometown: Madawaska, ME
Claim to Fame: Being dumped by Brad Womack on the last season of the Bachelor
After reading all 25 of the guys Bio's here what I have to say about them:
Ames, 31: He is on this show for the fame and to whore around too, I'm sure. Ashley, please don't give this guy a rose!
Anthony, 28: He's a butcher (creepy)... but seems like a nice fellow.
Ben C, 28: Ehhh, I'm not impressed. I'm sure he will be sweet and all, but not the one for her.
Ben F, 28: Winemaker +1, hair cut -3
Bentley, 28: His parents named him after a car, 1st mistake. 2nd Occupation: Businessman (can he be a bit more vague?) 3rd wearing a blue & red flannel for your official head shot says to me: I'm putting no effort into this and I'm an Ass!
Blake, 27: He's a Dentists so thats a good start and the guy can take a good photo.
Chris D, 25: Interview ? who do you most admire: "Barack Obama..." Minus 9,834,023,938,509 points! Sorry, you do not pass go, and do not collect a Rose! (p.s. I hope Ashely voted for Cheney/Palin)
Chris M, 27: He kinda looks like he's 16 & stoned but had good answers to his interview ?'s, so he won't be written off just yet.
Constantine, 30: I suspect he's actually a spy for whatever country still names their kids Constantine.
Frank, 26: The funny guys never lasts too long, sorry pal. P.S. your shirt has buttons for a reason.
J.P. 34: No picture, No love from me. Also, please don't be so vague in your q&a, it's not mysterious & sexy, just annoying.
Jeff, 35: "If he could be someone else for just one day, who would it be and why? Arnold, the Governator, for his fitness success and position in our community." Betcha he's regretting saying that now. LOL
J.P. 26: He's ok(ish) on paper... guess we will really see what he's like when he opens his mouth.
**OMG I'm only 1/2 way thru with these guys, why did I ever think writing about all of them was a good idea... I forgive you if you stop reading now and just look at their pictures from now on**
Lucas, 30: "Conservative Repupilcan" Plus 5 points, comment on going to the country club kinda makes you a dork, but that's ok still. Also, not too hard on the eyes. Hope he makes the top 3
Matt, 28: "Occupation: Office Supply Salesman" Can we say "The Office" I like this guy already. Also, the rest of his Q&A does not elude to him being a creeper. I think he will make top 5 (that is if he isn't a weirdo when he opens his mouth).
Michael, 29: He's ok, I don't have a strong opinion one way or another... I also, haven't heard him speak yet. Only time can tell...
Mickey, 31: I can't actually believe this guy has ever read a book. Also, I think he was casting for a different show, maybe "true beauty" lets say and got mixed up and wandered into the Bachelorette casting.
Nick, 26: He's got the whole Matthew McConaughey thing going for him...
Rob, 27: This guy reminds me of Stifler on American Pie.
Ryan M, 27: He's from Michigan so extra points for him! He kinda looks like a jock, which is also score additional points.
Ryan P, 31: This guy is the winner! I don't actually have any proof that he is the winner, but he looks cute, he answered his Q&A with charm & intelligence, loves the earth and well I just see him and Ashley together. Again, I've never heard him speak so I just hope he doesn't screw it but, because I'm already planning their wedding!
Stephen, 27: He is a hairstylist... with that hair... No rose for you sir.
Tim, 35: HAHAHA, I'm not sure why, I just laugh when I see this guy. There is just something about him that screams "I'm trying too hard and I act like I'm still in my early 20's" Please send him home on day 1 Ashley!
West, 30: I'm a sucker for blue eyes, and that's probably why I like this guy. There isn't anything that stands out about him in a good or bad way. I think he will go far in the show.
William, 30: "Do you have any pets and if so, what kind? No. Roommate has fish." He's cute but has no brain, if you didn't believe me from that last quote of his, heres another "Where do you see yourself in 5 years? Doing stand-up comedy or voice over work." Way to aim high my friend... way to aim high.
Finally I'm done! Be sure to tune into ABC Monday Night, at 9/8c and tell me what you think of the guys!! I hope my projected winner is actually a winner!
* All Photos were taken from ABC.com *